The Survivors

[philary]

Remembrance Day this year has taken on a new dimension. Visiting the battlefields for the first time and following the service of my Great Uncles listed below, has made me stop and ask the question were the ones who came home the lucky ones?

I have read about and spoken to children whose fathers returned and who were unable to create a warm, loving, close relationship with their offspring. They found it difficult to sustain the happy marraige they once had.

In order to survive had they blocked out the horrors and locked away their emotions so thoroughly that it was impossible for them to release them on their return? Did they feel so guilty because they had survived and their pals had not?

And so I ask the question who were the lucky ones? Perhaps the answer is no one.

What do you think?

Hilary

Lest we forget

[DaveDocDavies]

Hilary,

Thanks for sharing the beautiful photo!

I'd wager the expression "he came back, he's one of the lucky ones" was coined by an outside observer / pundit who knew little of what he spoke. "Survivor's guilt" levies a heavy burden on the "benefactor". The survivor must question his/her GOD about the choice, worthiness to have been spared. The greater the number of killed, maimed, missing ... the greater the unlikelihood of being spared ... the proportionally greater burden.

With improved psychiatric understanding of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, the survivor is offered better counsel. For those with a strong Faith, one may counsel that GOD has saved them for another purpose (perhaps as yet undisclosed). As several articles in Veteran's Day newspapers, previous war veterans are visiting and counseling newly wounded Iraq / Afghanistan casualties. Several veterans who had been struggling with survivor's guilt from Vietnam are now feeling healed by participating in therapy for new wounded survivors ... "I see why I was spared now." I'm afraid "shell shock" was newly being studied during the Great War ... veterans who were not functionally impaired probably didn't trip the radar amidst the large numbers of souls seriously scarred by their experiences.

I believe it might be said veterans who survived without physical impairments were fortunate ... however, they were forever changed. I don't think "lucky" would be an appropriate term as the psychological scars are every bit as painful, but not visible to the casual observer. I think you summed it up quite right: "no one was the lucky one."

Doc D

[Half-pint]

I've often wondered if this hasn't been the subject of a few (or many?) Masters' Theses and/or Doctoral Dissertatons, i.e. the inter- and intra-generational effects of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder suffered specifically from the Great War and, as a subset, POW survivors of that war. I would hazard the guess that many of us could supply anecdotal evidence.

Does anyone know of studies in this respect?

Regards,

Alison Causton

[Essexboy68]

Hello

Well, can we say whether the survivors were lucky or not? It really is a hard question to answer, & I do not believe there is a definitive answer anyway.

What you must remember is that the survivors came home & most managed to live for many years after, something those who fell could not do. The memories of lost comrades, friends & relatives stayed with them all their days, & the last few remaining veterans say that they think of them daily.

Yes, they were lucky in that they had the rest of their lives, but they were also unlucky to have lived through such experiences which affected them for the whole of their lives.

My great-grandfather, who served on the Western Front, suffered from shell shock, & also turned to drink as a result of his experiences (my late grandfather told me he hadn't been a drinker before the war), & I have no reason to believe this was unique.

Those of us who have served & lost friends & comrades do react in a variety of ways, I am sure it has always been so.

Just as an aside, many years ago when I was serving in a military hospital in the UK, we had a civilian patient who had been involved in the reception of released FEPOWs at the end of WW2. This experience had shocked him so much, he had wiped it from his memory, only to have it all flood back as a result of being a military hospital again, giving him nightmares & causing him great distress.

So, as I said, it is a very difficult question...........

[SPotter]

The survivor must question his/her GOD about the choice, worthiness to have been spared. The greater the number of killed, maimed, missing ... the greater the unlikelihood of being spared ... the proportionally greater burden.

I have always thought that this must have been an almost intolerable burden for the average man. It is most dramatically brought home by Tom Hanks character's final words in 'Saving Private Ryan', viz "Earn this..."

Steve

[Ken Morgan]

Lucky? Don't know about that, but I know that I, (and dozens of other members of my family), are lucky to exist at all. When I think about the huge losses of men, my grandfathers, and some GG uncles, G uncles and uncles should have been killed many times over. If it wasn't for the wars my family would be 10 times as big as it is now.

Everyone who experienced a battlefield was unlucky, dead or alive. We're the lucky ones.

[NIGEL]

How about my Grandfather, he spent his life since the age of 12 serving his country and survives the war, carries on serving in Ireland with the 1st Sherwood Foresters. When they find out he has caught TB, they kick him out to die, after 27 years service. If he had been killed on active duty, he would have been honoured and his grave given free and looked after for the next 90 years, but because he survived he got SWEET F.A.

[Guest Bert]

Having served as an infantryman in a more recent conflict, and having pondered upon this particular question quite often in the past thirty-four years, I should have to say that the men who were killed in the relative innocence of their youth, their minds full of enthusiasm and noble aspirations, surrounded by comrades who grieved for them with all of the limitless affection of youth, were (in my opinion) the most fortunate. That is why we refer to them as the Glorious Dead. They are immortal; forever young, strong, and happy, as they were when they died, in the first years of manhood. Save your pity for the survivors who have grown weak, ugly, and disillusioned - I am describing myself here, so no one should take offence.

[mcfc1923]

How about my Grandfather, he spent his life since the age of 12 serving his country and survives the war, carries on serving in Ireland with the 1st Worcesters. When they find out he has caught TB, they kick him out to die, after 27 years service. If he had been killed on active duty, he would have been honoured and his grave given free and looked after for the next 90 years, but because he survived he got SWEET F.A.

A land fit for heroes?---- i don't think so. I can fully understand your anger Nigel.

I wonder how many of those who returned, thought of themselves as heroes, my guess is not many, i'm sure a land fit for humans would have been more than enough.

LEST WE FORGET

JIM